Marco.org

I’m : a programmer, writer, podcaster, geek, and coffee enthusiast.

Sara Zucker asks for male comments on our opinions of the female body:

[…] society has attempted to make us females feel that we must be thin and fit to attract the male population, but i am quite sure that this is not true because, for any topic, opinions vary. […]

The ideal defined by “society” (fashion, more accurately?) is unachievable for nearly everyone. And keep in mind that there are three pressures at work here, from our point of view:

  1. Women are pressured to look like that ideal.
  2. Men are pressured to find and date people who look like that ideal.
  3. Men are pressured not to find other body types attractive.

That last one’s important. You may not have known about it. Plenty of guys are attracted to women who are far from skinny models, but they don’t want to admit it because they’re afraid of what other guys will think and say.

It takes a strong woman to ignore those ideals and be comfortable with herself as she is — similarly, it takes a strong man to ignore those pressures and let his natural attraction urges happen, even when he’s not being attracted to a model. Not every man is that strong.

Different men have different tastes and preferences. And it’s not just physical. Some women become more attractive as you talk with them and spend time with them. Others become hideously ugly after 30 seconds of interaction. Appearance is cheap. There’s an infinite supply of physically attractive women out there. But nothing can make an idiot interesting.

It’s also important to realize the distinction between “attracting the male population” (or attracting the fashion industry) and attracting enough men that you can choose some good ones to spend time with. You don’t need 3 billion people to want you.

In reality, you don’t need to achieve some unrealistic fashion ideal for men to be attracted to you. You can do it for yourself, or you can do it for fashion. But don’t do it for us. We really don’t care as much as you may think.